is a talent-exchanging network. More »
Join the TribeStart with 50 after offering a service.

Short Story or Story Excerpt Eval


10 per unit Virtual OK

I will receive a short story (or a story excerpt from a longer work which stands on its own) and provide you with feedback on its quality, potential, areas of strength, and suggestions for improvement.

We will work together by first engaging in an interview of 15-30 minutes via Google Hangouts, Skype, Viber, or WhatsApp. We will discuss your intended audience, genre, theme, and context, the desired style and emotional impact of the piece, and the medium it will be published in. This interview in itself is a service to be highly valued, as much can be learned from engaging in the kind of question and answer dialog I bring to the table.

I will then take your piece and evaluate it according to the following criteria:

- Overall plot structure and arc
- Character development and presentation
- Thematic nuance and coherence
- Stylistic structure of the narrative
- Setting development and description
- Technical craft and voice

I will then return an annotated version of your piece to you within a week and offer a shorter follow-up interview of 10-15 minutes to discuss my general impressions of the piece and its potential, as well as provide personal encouragement in your journey as a writer. I say a week, but it will probably be shorter, depending on my level of busyness. If you have a closer deadline let me know and we can negotiate. I will work with you.

As I noted, I will take short stories and also excerpts from longer works which can be evaluated independently of the longer work. If during the course of the first interview I deem the piece to be insufficiently independent, I will instead offer you a more limited evaluation purely on style and voice itself. If you want a review of a longer work, please see my other services offered. The lengths I will accept in this service are pieces of 1000-5000 words only. I will also reserve the right to refuse to edit a piece which I deem to be offensive due to excessive profanity or inappropriate subject matter.

Training & Qualifications

I am the founder and past owner of a writing community (, an experienced blogger (, and priorly, an Advanced Communicator Silver and Competent Leader with Toastmasters International, and the Public Relations and Marketing Manager for Penoaks Publishing ( I have worked with counseling and editing many fictional writings at multiple stages of their progress for many years.

Availability & Preferences

I'm usually free in the evenings other than Tuesdays, and mornings on Mondays, Fridays, and the weekends.

Trading Preference: I’m flexible, just hit me up!

Reviews of Jaymes

Apr 17, 2019
Jaymes is an encouraging and thoughtful reader! :)
Feb 26, 2019
Jaymes is amazing as always when it comes to reviewing my short stories and helping with brainstorming sessions! :)
Jan 29, 2019
Jaymes was speedy with his response, and I appreciate his analysis of my writing! He helped me confirm that I was on the right path with revisions. If... you need an insightful reader for your fiction, send your story to Jaymes! :)show more
Jan 24, 2019
Jaymes gave me excellent feedback and encouragement on my short story! I now realize what I need to change to make my story more cohesive and impactfu...l. I would definitely use his services again, and I highly recommend him to other wirters!show more
Aug 30, 2017
Jaymes always provides friendly and thoughtful feedback. :)
Aug 26, 2017
Jaymes provided helpful feedback on my story and was also very complimentary. I highly recommend working with him! :)
Inactive User
Inactive User received unit of Short Story or Story Excerpt Eval from Jaymes
Jan 26, 2017
Jaymes was very fun and easy to talk to. He is very knowledgeable of his writing craft and offered many structured and non-structured ideas to get the... most effect out of my story without compromising any creativity. I'll definitely be reaching out to him again as my story unfolds!show more
Nov 09, 2020
I had a wonderful conversation with Jaymes, full of insight and sparks. I certainly recommend his services and look forward to having more conversatio...ns with him. show more
Casia provided Help with Writing Advice Articles or Videos for Jaymes
Apr 03, 2019
It's always fun to connect with and help out other writers! Best of luck Jaymes, glad I could help you.
David left review for Jaymes
Mar 24, 2019
Well I thought things were going great, Jaymes is very kind and intelligent. Life may have gotten in the way (understandable) however, it's simply una...cceptable to completely ignore people who are counting on you for your services. I will not consider working with Jaymes in the future as our deal was due to be completed months ago. I've tried to be patient and understanding but communication is lacking heavily and I'm completely unaware of why. Keep this in mind before considering a deal with more


Join the TribeStart with 50 after offering a service.

Jaymes's other services

15-30 Minute Brainstorming Session
I am passionate about connections, relationships, and community. I believe in the power of crowds because I believe in the power of people and natural human interactions. I am a radical laissez fai...

15-30 Minute Brainstorming Session

Intellectual Discussion in Geekish
I am passionate about connections, relationships, and community. I believe in the power of crowds because I believe in the power of people and natural human interactions. I am a radical laissez fai...

Intellectual Discussion in Geekish

Edit and Improve Your Article
I am passionate about connections, relationships, and community. I believe in the power of crowds because I believe in the power of people and natural human interactions. I am a radical laissez fai...

Edit and Improve Your Article

Jaymes's requests

Jaymes is requesting
Writing Advice Articles or Videos
I am looking for online (free) material which provides tips or advice or tutorials on the writing craft. I am always looking to improve my skill and also for materials to share with my fellow write...

I am passionate about connections, relationships, and community. I believe in the power of crowds because I believe in the power of people and natural human interactions. I am a radical laissez fai...
Jaymes is requesting
Like-minded Christian Libertarians
I am looking for people. People who are of a common mindset with me with whom I can discuss and collaborate. If you fit my description or know someone who does who wouldn't mind being introduced, l...

I am passionate about connections, relationships, and community. I believe in the power of crowds because I believe in the power of people and natural human interactions. I am a radical laissez fai...

About Jaymes Lauser

Christian pandenominationalist, communicator, oldest-of-eight, reader, bibliophile, bookworm, self-taught omninerd, author, writer of thoughts, writer of fantasy and science fiction, speechwriter, pub...lic speaker, social media curator, coder, designer, conlanger, creation science apologist, technophile, Christian transhumanist, health nut, student of all things except sports and celebrity gossip. Jaymes Lauser was active in and studied many things growing up as a home-schooled youth. His primary education from a very early age was built around maintaining and developing both a love for learning and skill in learning. From there he branched out into multifarious interests and areas of study. He was particularly enamored with literature and the writing craft, computer software, the world of nature, theology and apologetics, and some particle physics thrown in on the side. He earned money during this time doing house sitting and grounds-keeping for elderly neighbors. At age 18 Jaymes and his immediate family immigrated to Ireland from the States. Due to being there on his father's work permit, he was not legally able to get a regular job there, but he filled his time productively with several ministries including the Reformers Unanimous Christ-based addiction recovery program and the Rebelution (as a forum moderator). He also started a part-time feelance web design and development service, teaching himself perl, php, html, css, javascript, ruby on rails, and MySQL, as well as the WordPress and phpBB3 platforms. During this time he also founded the Holy Worlds Writing Community, an online community for Christian writers of fantasy, science fiction, and historical fiction, and then grew it with rapid success to over seven hundred members. After almost 4 years he got the opportunity to work as an office manager for the Reformers Unanimous Recovery home in Dublin. It only paid a small stipend, and so was legal, and was very rewarding and provided great experience. While there, Jaymes was certified as an NETdevice (NeuroElectric Therapy) practitioner, and helped coordinate the partnership between the Reformers Unanimous ministry and its sister ministry, ScotNet, in Scotland. Soon after this, Jaymes flew back to the States, where, true to his upbringing, Jaymes pursued a self-education plan, devouring hundreds of books and becoming prominently active in as many beneficial programs and ministries as he could. For example, Jaymes invested his time heavily into Toastmasters International, earning his Advanced Leader Bronze and Advanced Communicator Silver awards and assisting as temporary Secretary and Vice President of Education. He also finished the 12-step Celebrate Recovery program and served as its Small Groups Coordinator. During this time he has worked as a kitchen worker, and then as a chapel clerk, where he assisted with secretarial duties, office management, library oversight, volunteer liaison, and videography for various programs. Jaymes now lives in Aberdeen, Washington, developing a freelance business into his own company doing Full Stack Development, and serving as the Public Relations and Marketing Manager for Penoaks Publishing. He is also the Vice President of Education for the local chapter of Toastmasters International, the Harbor Toastmasters Club, and the Area C35 Director in Toastmasters District 32. He is active in church men's ministry, as always, and participates in community outreach on a regular basis. He is studying the language of Esperanto and is constantly surrounded by books. He is also reawakening his writing craft both in work on fiction writing and in his blogging. He also has plans to found a non-profit organization as a resource and support network helping Christian nerds exemplify an elevated standard of character. Jaymes's core values include: Humility - recognizing his own strengths but not attention-seeking; Honesty - never deceptive, and transparent with discretion; Meekness - keeping his strengths under control and putting others first; Teachableness - eager and willing to learn and be corrected; Joy - finding gratitude and enjoyment in every situation; Integrity - consistency and reliability in mood, character, ethics, and lifestyle; Peaceful - affable, loving, forgiving, and looking for the common ground; Courtesy - kind and respectful to everyone regardless of differences; Servant-leadership - leading through serving and serving through leading. Jaymes's hobbies and interests include: reading, blogging, writing fiction, social media curation, public speaking, biblical study, coding, design, political science, creation apologetics, technology, linguistics, research, education, recreational mathematics, behavioral science, social psychology, community architecture, history, prepping, music, health, and more

Open to other proposals
Jaymes Lauser is looking for:
  • Just for Fun
  • Cheap & Easy
  • Gaming
  • Fun & Quirky
  • Bike Maintenance
  • Web/Software Development
  • Graphic Design
  • Language Lessons
  • Learning
  • Chiropractic
  • Dance
  • Photography
  • Tailoring & Sewing
  • Music & Audio
  • Custom Art
  • Craftwork
  • Art & Design