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Rant From A Girl Working In Retail

1


1 per package - Virtual OK

Hello, I’m Lauren, and I work in retail! Do you find yourself waking up in the morning thinking to yourself, “I wonder what REALLY was going through that girl’s head in the store...” WELL GUESS WHAT. It’s your lucky day.

The sheer amount of sh*t I witness and tolerate is mind numbing, and for 1 Simbi, I will humorously (to the best of my ability) detail an event that happened to me that day. As I write this I am recovering from a case of “wayward children climbing the scratching posts” which is comorbid with “I don’t have a receipt, but it should be in ‘your system’”.

My only rule is that I leave the company’s name out (as well as the names and details of my coworkers) as things can get a little hairy. 😂

This service also doubles as therapy for me, so if you’re not into traditional charity, you may consider me as alternative charity.

Training & Qualifications


I can stand behind a cash desk quite nicely, stay loosely within dress code, pontificate about Product A, and most of all- search for a smile from the deepest depths of my frozen heart, as I am actually quite opposed to fake smiles.

Availability & Preferences


When not collecting rant material I can be seen sitting on long buss trips, phone in hand, ready to type with the fury of a 1000 suns.

Trading Preference: I’m flexible, just hit me up!

Reviews of Lauren


J received package of Rant From A Girl Working In Retail from Lauren
Mar 13, 2018
Received a great rant, as promised! Great idea for a service!
Lucie received package of Rant From A Girl Working In Retail from Lauren
Feb 13, 2018
Lauren's Pet Store Rant was hilarious, detailed and reminded me of the frustrating and funny times when I used to work retail. I highly recommend this... service!show more
Mo received package of Rant From A Girl Working In Retail from Lauren
Feb 13, 2018
What an entertaining storyteller!!
Stephanie received package of Rant From A Girl Working In Retail from Lauren
Jan 23, 2018
Lauren is sure to make you laugh out loud. Literally. Her story had me rolling and definitely made my day.
Paula provided Help with What Is Your Favourite Colour? for Lauren
Mar 14, 2019
Sorry for the late review, but it was nice and easy.
Thomas provided unit of Tea blending for Lauren
May 24, 2018
what a happy customer.
Jessi Pettit
Jessi received unit of Perler Bead Pixel Art Free Shipping from Lauren
Apr 24, 2018
Even though Lauren communicated with me for most of the process, it was an excessive amount of time to receive these. They are incredibly cute, though.... Thank you.show more
Melvin provided unit of Advanced handwriting analysis for Lauren
Apr 07, 2018
A pleasure to work with her again.
Gregor provided hour of 3D Modeling and 3D Printing for Lauren
Mar 30, 2018
Lauren was a pleasure to work with again. I enjoyed 3-d printing the objects she found on thingiverse. I highly recommend Lauren as a customer!
Nubs bought Holographic Pink Petal Stickers from Lauren
Mar 30, 2018
Wonderful thank you!!


Recommendations


Join the TribeStart with 50 after offering a service.

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Lauren's requests


Lauren is requesting
Find Canadian Users!
Hello! I am looking to grow a group of Canadian users to join The Canadian Traders Group with Simbi's new group function, primarily to keep shipping costs low for sending goodies (almost all my dea...

I'm excited for all the collaboration that is about to ensue! I love to help people and am in need of some unique services, mostly artsy things and some help here & there. It's great to be able to ...
Lauren is requesting
Crochet “Don’t Care Bear” Teddy
Hello, my name is Lauren, and I have a specific crochet pattern I would like made into the real thing! :) The Don’t Care Bear (featuring a marijuana leaf on its tummy) would be for my boyfriend who...

I'm excited for all the collaboration that is about to ensue! I love to help people and am in need of some unique services, mostly artsy things and some help here & there. It's great to be able to ...
Lauren is requesting
RESERVED: Crochet by Grace A.
This listing is for a Simbi friend of mine, Grace, so we can keep track of what is being made! :) *No patterns needed 1 Houndoom. Size: Small desk ornament up to teddy bear. 150 Simbi 1 Sy...

I'm excited for all the collaboration that is about to ensue! I love to help people and am in need of some unique services, mostly artsy things and some help here & there. It's great to be able to ...

About Lauren McCoy

* ACCOUNT ON LONG TERM HIATUS - Will not respond to messages right away. I’m sorry for any inconvenience!* Hello! First off, may I say that this is a great community- what an original idea! I have ...an associates degree in creative writing, studied as a hairdresser, work in pet nutrition, and make lot's of crafts! I excel in making stickers, Perler Bead crafts, flat felt designs, and some digital services. Keep an eye on my Market Pieces! I can't wait to work with you to make something you'll treasure! I have bipolar disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder and would love to support others who struggle with any of the above (although my ADHD is pretty mild). It's so important to have people to reach out to that are uplifting, supportive, and relatable. I've learned to live with all of my "illnesses" and am feeling well! As for my personality, I am essentially a big puddle of emotions that always tries to sort itself out and figure where to pitter patter on to next. Relationships are super important to me so I put friends, family, and "lovers" first, haha! All I want is a modest living where I have friends to see, family to hug, animals to also hug, and someone who still goes, "daaaaaayum you sexy" when I'm 80! ;) Anyway, I'm quite friendly so please leave me a message about whatever you please and I'll get back to you as soon as possible! ❤ Pls note: I have a bit of a roller coaster life at times so sometimes I need to respond in a few days, and extend service completion dates. I highly appreciate your kindness and patience! 🙂show more

Open to other proposals
Lauren McCoy is looking for:
  • Fun & Quirky
  • Cheap & Easy
  • Gaming
  • Just for Fun
  • Handyman services
  • Makeup
  • Skincare
  • Nailcare
  • Cleaning
  • Transport & Rideshares
  • Experiences
  • Adventure
  • Tailoring & Sewing
  • Craftwork
  • Custom Art